How Do You Know?

Veranda, November December 2007, Ex-votos of silver, gilt bronze and crystals from Southern France, late 19th c. Photo by Peter Vitale

How do you know when it is right? How do you know when that person is "it" for you? Do you know right away? At first sight? I suppose it is different for everyone. I am not one to subscribe to the idea of "love at first sight". I think one might come closer to that concept as one gets older and has gone through many "wrongs". One can then eliminate from the picture what doesn't fit much faster...and concentrate on a person who may just be more "right." But without that experience, how can one really know?

I cannot ever forget the first time I saw my husband. Yes......meeting on a New Year's Eve does make it just that much easier to remember I suppose. And I guess that seeing one's future spouse walk through the door decked out in a classic tuxedo can't hurt one's memory either. It started out as sort of a group blind date with a couple of my roommates and girlfriends. I had dated sporadically since moving back to San Diego after a year living in Louisiana, but was not serious about anyone I had met. I had invited my cousin "H" to be my date for an evening of parties and a big black tie gala. And he brought his best friend with him. I can't say that I knew that night that he was the one. Not even after all of our friends had mysteriously disappeared over the course of the evening leaving us alone at the stroke of midnight. But the next day, when we took a walk on the foggy beach and had fish tacos at a stand on the beach....I knew I wanted to see him again. And see each other we did...every weekend from then on...and eventually every day.

So...how did you know? When did you know? Did it take flowers and candy and jewelry to make you swoon....or was it a simple walk on a beach and sharing a fish taco?

I wish you all a Valentine's Day full of simple things, easy things....like hugs, a loving glance, a warm heart. And of course .....love.