He Was There From The Start

My brother, John, was two years older than I, so he was there to show me the ropes from the first. We grew up in Pasadena, California and spent every summer in Newport Beach, California. John was there to introduce me and our brother, Stuart to all of the important things. He showed me that eating sand might not be the best thing in the world, but that standing up tall was always good.....

John was a different sort of brother. He was smart and creative. He was the chief sand fort builder and fireworks starter every summer. The best egg finder every Easter and lead toy train engineer every Christmas......

He was a very happy camper in his youth....

John was an athlete, and won the Best All Around Player in our football league his last year of High School. He was a sailor and an artist, a music aficionado (Moody Blues, the Beatles, Eric Clapton...he was the expert.) He taught me about all the greats....

John lived in New Mexico in Santa Fe, and I would visit twice a year at Christmas and in the Summer. He loved the wide open spaces and walking in the desert. He taught me to love it too....

John went off to college in Las Cruces, New Mexico and made the town his home. But he would come and visit every year.

John was there for the important things. He stood by me at my wedding......

He was a doting uncle and could not wait to hear what my girls were doing and looked forward to seeing them every Christmas.....

My brother John was so many things. Gentle, compassionate, caring and grateful for what he had in his life. He had a very simple life compared to most, and yet it was what he wanted. John was all of these things, and yet, he was different. John was also challenged with schizophrenia. His condition made for some very difficult moments, especially before medications became available that were more effective at keeping the demons at bay. But medications did improve, and John had a life that worked for him, friends and a community who cared for him. Yet, these same medications that helped him so much also created health issues that finally took their toll.

John unexpectedly passed away last week, and I will miss him so very much. My big brother.

John would walk in the desert every day and gaze at the beauty of the Organ Mountain Range on the east side of the Rio Grande's rift valley. We would talk about how beautiful it was. He passed away in a place he loved, and we will place him to rest there this week.

I like to think of John with his happy grin, like we had cruising in the back of our station wagon before we had seat belts, when we had it all in front of us without a care....